What's the difference between God and a Barrister? God doesn't think He's a barrister.
What's the difference between a barrister and a broken watch? Neither of them work - but the watch is right twice a day.
What's the difference between a BVC student and a mobile phone? A mobile phone comes with a plan.
What's the difference between a pupil and a mushroom? No difference, they're both kept in the dark and have loads of shit shovelled on them.
How many barristers does it take to change a lightbulb? How many can you afford?
The Barrister wakes up after surgery and asks; 'why are the curtains drawn?' The nurse says, 'there's a fire across the street and we didn't want you to think the operation was a failure.'
Why can't barristers have sex with their clients? To prevent double billing.
What happens to a barrister when he takes viagra? He gets taller.
What's the difference between a barrister and a duck? Once in a while the duck will stick its bill up its arse.
Why do surgeons love barristers? Because they're easy to operate on: gutless, with no organs except lips and arseholes - and those are interchangeable.
Barrister chat up line? 'I'm a barrister. I'm trained to get you off'.
Why did the barrister cross the road? To sue the chicken.
How do you get 100 barristers in a Mini? You make 1 a High Court Judge and the other 99 will crawl up his arse.
What do you get when you cross a barrister with a demon from hell? A barrister.
What's the difference between a barrister and a trampoline? You take your shoes off to jump on a trampoline.
What's the difference between a cat and a barrister? One is an arrogant creature which will utterly ignore you unless you can do something for it. The other is a pet.
On holiday with their respective families Joe meets Max who he hasn't seen for years. 'What are you doing with yourself these days' he asks. 'I'm a barrister' whispers Max, 'but don't tell my wife. She thinks I'm still a pimp'.
What's the difference between a barrister and an onion? You cry when you cut up an onion.
A client comes to Chambers for a conference and is told that her barrister has died. The next day she comes back and asks to see that same barrister. The receptionist says 'He's dead and you know that. Why are you asking to see him?' The client replies, 'I just love hearing it'.
A pupil was sent to a far-away town to represent a long-term client accused of robbery. After 3 days he won the case and the client was acquitted. Excited about his success, the pupil texted his pupilmaster "Justice prevailed." The pupilmaster replied in haste: "Go back in and ask for permission to appeal."
Thursday 26 May 2011
Monday 23 May 2011
Law Practitioners Act (Amendment) Bill 2011 & The Institute for Legal and Judicial Studies Bill 2011
I have been at the UoM for 3 years and have heard various stories from different persons including those who were called to discuss with us on our future careers. Of all things, it is the Bar Vocational Course (BVC) which has been at the heart of every debates in which we were engaged. We were completely at bay when the persons questioned were unable to give us concrete answers. We have been told on countless occasions that the Bar Exams is very tough and only the best will get through and it is this argument which justifies the low number of passes each year.
But then if you have to make one student pass the BVC each year, what is the use of running the course itself? Compared to the situation in England where the pass rate for students taking the BVTC each brushes the 90%, there is something wrong and lacking in our system which itself consists of the remnants of the English Legal System which dates back to the colonial period. We haven't changed much since!
The New Bill due to be presented at the National Assembly (can be found @: http://www.gov.mu/portal/goc/assemblysite/file/bill0911.pdf or http://www.gov.mu/portal/goc/assemblysite/file/bill0911.pdf) brings into the issue a new institution (Institute for Judicial and Legal Studies) that will be responsible for the issuing of authorisation to conduct the BVC. There will be an overhaul of the Course itself to add new subjects such as Legal Drafting, Conferencing, Opinion Writing, etc. Also, students holding a professional qualification (BVC) from countries forming part of the Commonwealth will be eligible for admission at the Bar. It also includes those who have obtained their professional qualification form the United States of America.
Despite these proposed changes, I am still doubtful of the manner in which the exams will be conducted, as to who will be the examiners and whether the results in its totality with marks for each subject will be published for public disclosure/scrutiny and in order to ensure transparency or it will still be the same.
Having completed my LLB(Hons) with all those questions on my mind, I am eagerly waiting for the amendments to be passed to see the results in order to better plan my career and I think that it is also the case for all my friends of the 2008-2011 LLB(Hons) class as well as who have attempted the BVC before. Hopefully, it will be done before November as we have to pay the fees for the BVC as from the 3rd of December.
But for now, let us enjoy our holidays which I hope will not become permanent!
Below is a list of all Commonwealth Countries:
Out of the above 54 nations, Fiji is currently suspended from the Commonwealth of Nations.
From: http://www.list4everything.com/list-of-commonwealth-nations.html
Fiat Lux,
But then if you have to make one student pass the BVC each year, what is the use of running the course itself? Compared to the situation in England where the pass rate for students taking the BVTC each brushes the 90%, there is something wrong and lacking in our system which itself consists of the remnants of the English Legal System which dates back to the colonial period. We haven't changed much since!
The New Bill due to be presented at the National Assembly (can be found @: http://www.gov.mu/portal/goc/assemblysite/file/bill0911.pdf or http://www.gov.mu/portal/goc/assemblysite/file/bill0911.pdf) brings into the issue a new institution (Institute for Judicial and Legal Studies) that will be responsible for the issuing of authorisation to conduct the BVC. There will be an overhaul of the Course itself to add new subjects such as Legal Drafting, Conferencing, Opinion Writing, etc. Also, students holding a professional qualification (BVC) from countries forming part of the Commonwealth will be eligible for admission at the Bar. It also includes those who have obtained their professional qualification form the United States of America.
Despite these proposed changes, I am still doubtful of the manner in which the exams will be conducted, as to who will be the examiners and whether the results in its totality with marks for each subject will be published for public disclosure/scrutiny and in order to ensure transparency or it will still be the same.
Having completed my LLB(Hons) with all those questions on my mind, I am eagerly waiting for the amendments to be passed to see the results in order to better plan my career and I think that it is also the case for all my friends of the 2008-2011 LLB(Hons) class as well as who have attempted the BVC before. Hopefully, it will be done before November as we have to pay the fees for the BVC as from the 3rd of December.
But for now, let us enjoy our holidays which I hope will not become permanent!
Below is a list of all Commonwealth Countries:
| Country Name | Date of Joining |
| Antigua and Barbuda | 1 November 1981 |
| Australia | 11 December 1931 |
| Bahamas | 10 July 1973 |
| Bangladesh | 18 April 1972 |
| Barbados | 30 November 1966 |
| Belize | 21 September 1981 |
| Botswana | 30 September 1966 |
| Brunei | 1 January 1984 |
| Cameroon | 13 November 1995 |
| Canada | 11 December 1931 |
| Cyprus | 13 March 1961 |
| Dominica | 3 November 1978 |
| Gambia | 18 February 1965 |
| Ghana | 6 March 1957 |
| Grenada | 7 February 1974 |
| Guyana | 26 May 1966 |
| India | 15 August 1947 |
| Jamaica | 6 August 1962 |
| Kenya | 12 December 1963 |
| Kiribati | 12 July 1979 |
| Lesotho | 4 October 1966 |
| Malawi | 6 July 1964 |
| Malaysia | 16 September 1963 |
| Maldives | 9 July 1982 |
| Malta | 21 September 1964 |
| Mauritius | 12 March 1968 |
| Mozambique | 13 November 1995 |
| Namibia | 21 March 1990 |
| Nauru | 1 November 1968 |
| New Zealand | 11 December 1931 |
| Nigeria | 1 October 1960 |
| Pakistan | 14 August 1947 |
| Papua New Guinea | 16 September 1975 |
| Rwanda | 29 November 2009 |
| Saint Kitts and Nevis | 19 September 1983 |
| Saint Lucia | 22 February 1979 |
| Saint Vincent and the Grenadines | 27 October 1979 |
| Samoa | 28 August 1970 |
| Seychelles | 29 June 1976 |
| Sierra Leone | 27 April 1961 |
| Singapore | †15 October 1965 |
| Solomon Islands | 7 July 1978 |
| South Africa | 11 December 1931 |
| Sri Lanka | 4 February 1948 |
| Swaziland | 6 September 1968 |
| Tanzania | 26 April 1964 |
| Tonga | 4 June 1970 |
| Trinidad and Tobago | 31 August 1962 |
| Tuvalu | 1 October 1978 |
| Uganda | 9 October 1962 |
| United Kingdom | 11 December 1931 |
| Vanuatu | 30 July 1980 |
| Zambia | 24 October 1964 |
| Fiji | 10 October 1970 |
| Ireland | 11 December 1931 |
| Zimbabwe | 1 October 1980 |
From: http://www.list4everything.com/list-of-commonwealth-nations.html
Fiat Lux,
Monday 2 May 2011
Updates
More to follow from the law locker! For the time being have got exams and not too much time to devote for this but will get on with it as soon as exams are over! Btw had IHL exams today and still found time to type this!
Fiat Lex!
Sandeep
Fiat Lex!
Sandeep
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